You had me from.....positive

It is after midnight but I can never sleep when my husband isn't home from work yet. And now I just spent the last ten minutes crying through the end of a movie. A movie about a young girl who had a baby and in the end she decides to give the baby up for an open adoption. I then went through the house to turn off the lights to get ready for bed and the light is still on in my little girls room. She stayed the night with my sister tonight and I broke down crying all over again when I looked in her empty bed. It's crazy the emotions that can get going just through watching a movie. I have had SO many life changing events happen in the past few months. I have watched too many families suffer through the heartache of losing loved ones and each thing has affected my life in a different way. And tonight...it was a simple movie. There is absolutely no words to describe what it feels like to have a child. But it starts way beyond that. In this case, I can remember clear as yesterday when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. I was scared, excited, scared, and excited. I was scared because I had a miscarriage 8 months before. I was excited because ever since having a miscarriage I had wanted a baby so bad. I was scared because I didn't feel pregnant. I was excited to even think that there was a baby already developing inside me. Even though she would be sleeping I miss my baby girl so much right now and she's only been gone for 6 hours. But I always look in on her sleeping before I go to bed at night. And when I see her tomorrow, that hug is going to last just a little bit longer. I want to take the time to walk outside with her. Even if its just to the mailbox. She loves going outside. Im going to get my living room cleaned top to bottom so I dont have to tell her no every five seconds. Im going to not worry about the mess in the laundry room and just sit and play in the floor with her. Who knows what tomorrow holds besides God? I want to know that I never take a day for granted. Anyways, this is my heart tonight. I love you baby girl!

Stuffed Shells

I tried another new recipe tonight. It was spinach stuffed pasta shells. It wasn't bad but it was just kind of bland. I would eat it again but I think I probably wont be making it again. Maybe if I came across another recipe of it that looked like it would have more flavor. I did take a pic if anyone wants to see it. We will be eating it tomorrow night as well. It being just the two of us really eating we almost always have leftovers with stuff like that. Usually when I make chicken or porkchops I only cook however many pieces I think we will eat.

So any other news to share? Nope...not really. I had gained a few pounds back and I really need to start working hard on losing some more. You know, before I dont have the chance anymore ;). And thats all for now because this post is even boring me just writing it!

Chicken and Wild Rice Soup

This was what we had for supper tonight and it was so good. I made it with some breadsticks that are really easy to put together using bisquik mix. As always I take no credit because I am a cookbook junkie. I am writing down the original recipe and then will tell you what I did different

1/2 cup finely chopped carrot (1 medium)

1/2 cup finely chopped onion (1 medium)

1/2 cup finely chopped celery (1 medium)

1 tbsp. butter

4 cups of chicken broth

3/4 cup wild rice, rinsed and drained

12 oz. boneless, skinless chkn breast halves, cut in 3/4 in. pieces

2 tbsp. all purpose flour

2 tbsp. butter softened

2 cups half and half

In a Dutch oven cook and stir carrot, onion and celery in hot butter about 5 minutes or until tender. Add broth and wild rice. Bring to boiling, reduce heat. Simmer, covered, for 30 minutes. Add chicken. Simmer, covered, for 20-25 minutes more or until rice is tender.

In a small bowl combine flour with softened butter to make a smooth paste. Stir flour mixture into the rice mixture. Cook and stir until thickened and bubbly. Cook and stir for one minute more. Add half and half. Cook and stir until heated through.

NOTES- I never use celery anything and that was the only thing I eliminated in this recipe. It may look long but it was pretty simple and delicous. For the breadsticks you take 1 cup of bisquick and 1/4 cup of milk and mix with some shredded cheese. Roll out on flour surface and shape into rectangle. Then cut in strips and bake on greased pan at 375 12-15 minutes.

Father's Day Weekend

Well, we had a pretty enjoyable weekend. Brad was out of town last week and got home Friday afternoon. I met him at his moms and we spent the evening there with our niece that comes in about every other weekend. Then Saturday we really didn't do much of anything until we had our date night. We dropped our daughter off with my sister and then took our son to my mamaws. Date nights are very hard to pull off now because I'm nursing. We went out to dinner and then we went back to mamaws so I could feed the baby and then we went to watch a movie. We saw The Karate Kid and I enjoyed it. It was funny and the only thing I can remember that was bad in it was there were three cuss words in it. But other than that it was a decent movie and pretty funny. It was 1030 by the time the movie was over so it was around 11 when we headed home. Needless to say we were pooped by the time we got home.
Today is Father's Day and we cooked out after church at Brad's mom and dads. We had steak and chicken and grilled vegetables. But the rest of the day was very uneventful and boring. The Nascar race was on all day (VERY BORING) and then while being forced to watch this half of the men fell asleep. So we had a nice date but other than that a pretty uneventful weekend and I have zero pictures. I'm not so good at taking pics anymore. And right now I just want to go to bed...but that doesn't look like its coming anytime soon.

Trip to the mall

A trip to the mall is something I would never brave by myself. I honestly dont know how mothers of multiples does it. I guess its just one of those things you do what you have to. I'm really trying to let that soak in. Where instead of getting stressed I just do what I have to do and know that God will get me through it. But today wasn't like that. My sister was taking my niece and a friend of hers to the mall so I loaded up the babies and followed them. It was an absolute sunny bright day at my house and by the time I got to Huntsville it was pouring down rain. I was originally going to go with 2 umbrella strollers but it was quicker just to get out the double stroller(in the pouring rain). I wasn't really going to buy anything but once I got there I thought it would be nice to find a nice dressy outfit but that of course didn't happen. For one, I dont fit into those clothes anymore and two, I dont feel like I should even wear most of those clothes. I have no idea what my style is anymore. At first my son was still sleepy so he was kind of cranky at first but after walkiing around for awhile he eventually fell asleep and slept for about an hour. And then when he woke up it was past his feeding time but we were getting ready to leave and I didnt really want to feed him in the mall and he actually took his sisters sippy cup and was drinking the juice!! I can't tell you what a shock this is. I may just have to skip a bottle alltogether with him and go straight to the cup! I was also able to go to Kays Jewelers and get my rings cleaned for free. That is probably what really made my day. I have only been able to start wearing them again in the last two weeks and before that it had been about two years since I've worn them. Now they are so shiny and look brand new! I haven't been able to quit looking at them. I ended up buying the same cleaner they used but it was only $6.00 and now I can always have clean rings. So this was my first trip to the mall with two babies and it was quite enjoyable.

December 26, 2009

So hands down I have the most adorable daughter EVER!! She is also the most defiant one! To my 4 followers you all know who my babies are. I am extremely nervous about anything over the internet and have decided I dont want to mention their names in my blog anymore. I will probably go back and look at my previous posts. So for future reference my daughter will be D and my son S. Hopefully not too confusing. But this story is for one particular reader. And it will be the story of my son coming into the world.



He was born right after Christmas but I must go to Christmas morning first. I was 39 weeks, HUGE and miserable. I had been saying for weeks I didnt care if I had this baby on Christmas day I just did not want to wait any longer. Christams day around lunch time we always have lunch with Brad's extended family. I wanted to start there because one of Brads cousins looked at me and said "You are going to have this baby today." My reaction? "Yeah right" Then Christmas night we went to my sister's for Christmas with my immediate family. This part of the evening is interesting because one of my sisters had gotten this chair massager thing with a heating option as well. At one point the others are playing a game and I open her gift ...:)...to try it out. Once I had been discovered I of course told her I was testing it out for her. I also joked about trying to go into labor with it. Also while playing cards I had one sharp pain. ONE. I had been having pains off and on for weeks so this of course meant nothing to me. Then as we are getting ready to leave one of my sisters suggest that she keep D overnight. Give us one last break before this second baby came. So we leave her and on the way home I even tell Brad it sure would be a good night to go into labor since D was already with someone else.



So....it was about 1130 when we finally got home and collapsed in the bed. We couldn't have been asleep long because it was around midnight when I woke up. Now I'm not sure if I had sprung a leak in my sleep or it happened right when I woke up. Either way Im laying there in bed wondering if my water had broke. I wake Brad up and say "Brad, I think my water just broke. Feel my bottom and see if its wet?" (This cracks me up now) As soon as I got the words out of my mouth though a gush of water comes out. I then jump out of bed going "YUP...IT BROKE!" And then I start jumping up and down saying "Oh my gosh, Im so nervous. Im so nervous" If someone else had been around it really was hysterical. The whole time water just keeps coming out. I had went to the bathroom and when I thought I was done had changed clothes. Then it happened again and I started to change clothes again before I realized what a not so bright idea that was. Meanwhile, Brad got really sick. I think just from having no sleep and jumping out of the bed. So while Im getting the rest of my bad ready he was throwing up. Within 15-20 minutes we were out the door and had already called the dr. where I then found out that my doctor had asked his backup to be on call for him. I was already so upset because this dr. had been so rude on the phone. He was so rude it was almost all I talked about the whole way to the hospital. So....we were on our way and phone calls had been made when I realized I had not had one single contraction. But within a few minutes of realizing that they started coming on very strong and very fast. When we got to the hospital I told Brad the wrong way to go and the door was locked so we had to walk around to the emergency entrance which seemed a mile away when I was doubled over with pain. We get a wheelchair head up to the floor and was made to sit and wait on a nurse. I was actually shocked. My water had broke, I was having VERY painful contractions every 1-2 minutes and we waited at least 10-15 minutes. From my understanding, that could be 10 minutes to late for some women. By the time they got me back in the room and changed I was already dialated to a 6. At this point I was so excited and so nervous. My dr. had already agreed that if I went into labor on my own I could try and have a vaginal delivery. (I had just had a c-section 11 months prior to this birth) A few people had already arrived at the hospital when Dr. Harris walks in. Its actually still hard for me to think about this part. He walks right in and tells me that he absolutely does not do VBACS. I literally felt like someone had just crushed my world. I wanted to experience childbirth so bad and I knew if I didn't get to this time my chances were very slim for ever getting to. I just wanted to lay back and cry. And to make matters worse this dr. was still being as rude as ever. Like its my fault I went in labor the morning after Christmas and in the middle of the night. They know it's like that when they chose that profession. So Im prepped for the c-section and I can at least be thankful that this one was completely different than my last one. I was awake the entire time, Brad was back there with me and he was able to take pictures and record it! I threw up 3 times after they gave me the numbing medicine. That happened after I had my epidural with the first birth. But this was disgusting. It was Christmas dinner. It was embarassing. I felt absolutely nothing until they started pulling the baby out. Then it felt like something was crushing down on my chest and I could barely breathe. On the video you can hear me grunting and making awful sounds. Thats embarassing too! You could tell by the cry it was a boy. Our first son! All 8 lbs and 13 oz of him! Which I actually thought was small compared to the first but all the nurse's thought he was big!
Of course there are things next time I want to do different. If I ever get to have a VBAC Im thinking of letting someone else in there besides Brad. We still dont want to find out what we are having. (S) is absolutely all boy and completely different than (D) ever was as a baby. He refuses a pacifier, she cant live without hers. He refuses a bottle, she refused the alternative. She screamed anytime we got in a car, he generally goes to sleep. She NEVER slept like a baby, and he did at first. She lost all her baby fat and got really skinny, he is as chubby as ever. They now weigh the same.

He is such a blessing to us. He is a complete momma's boy. He rarely can be comforted by anyone else. He still sleeps in the bed with me. That's because I love my sleep and I get more rest that way. He loves to watch cartoons and he cries when the dvd stops. He LOVES to be held. He would be completely content to sit in your lap all day. He loves his sister. He loves it when she talks to him and he just sits and watches her smiling the whole time. He says dadda and momma. Not as words of course but he babbles it a lot. Mostly dadda. His eyes are still in between a green color and a brown. And he's really starting to like his dadda too. He will twist around to look at him and just smile up at him. He absolutley loves to be outside. He starts smiling every time the wind hits his face. I could go on and on but this was just supossed to be the story of his birth. So here it is. I probably left out some details in some areas and told too many in others. Just ask if you want to know anything else! -I also did not go back and proof read

BBQ Weekend

This past weekend was exhausting. We were at Brads mom and dads Saturday. About 2 in the afternoon Brad went to go get some ice cream out of the freezer and discovered that the door had not been shut all the way and everything in it was completely thawed! This is a stand up freezer that was in the garage. It held our extra stuff as well as his mom and dad's. In the end it held the meat of 3 deer, about 40 lbs of chicken, fish, roast, porkchops, and bacon among other things. So EVERYTHING had to be cooked and then still lots of things had to be thrown away. We immediately started up the smokers and the grill and had to get to preparing the meat. We then had to finish cooking what was left Sunday. It was literally exhausting. And when the deer meat had thawed it left the whole bottom of the freezer completely full of blood. It was disgusting. But today is Monday, Im still exhausted and hopefully I will not be cooking any meat for the rest of the week!!! In the end we did get to spend time with some friends and the food was delicious!!
The funny thing is we were on our way home Friday night when Brad said that if we didn't get to eating some of the deer there wouldnt really be any point in him hunting this year. Irony....

Dog Bite

I am absolutely horrible at telling stories and I know this so please bare with me. I usually end up telling 5 different stories before I ever get to the end of the first story I started telling. Plus I'm a woman and we like to go into details on describing things. I mean is the wall ever just painted plain blue? Of course not. Its probably a turqoise with just a hint of the shade of the sky or something to that affect. See....haven't even started my story and I've already written the first paragraph.

So, Thursday afternoon I went walking with a friend of mine, Stacy. I was also pushing my daughter in the stroller. We had already been around the circle once when we were passing by a house with dogs barking through the window at us when suddenly they came flying out the front door. The bigger one, a medium sized mutt, bit me on the back of the leg. It happened so fast and I didn't see it coming. When they came running out of the house I immediately started pushing the stolller off the road and walking away. The dog bit me and then ran back into the yard but was still facing us barking like crazy. I immediately kept walking trying to get as far away as possible. The owner then comes out and stand on the porch and Stacy tells him he needs to get his dog that it had just bitten me and he just stands there on the porch. With the dogs still right there at us!!!

And the way things worked out it really is amazing to see the hand of God on the situation. At first it looked like an awful bite. It immediately turned into a huge purple knot and bleeding. And it hurt SO bad. You wouldn't think it would hurt that bad but it was a throbbing pain all night long. Thankfully it happened right next door to a nurse's house that I go to church with. And then, Stacy's stepdad is an EMT and she called him too. So we went to nurse's house and she starts cleaning it off then the EMT comes and he cleaned it off and bandaged it up and took my blood pressure and all of that. He also suggested that we file a report and so we did. By this point my husband was there. I really will try and condense this....in the end the police officer found out that the dog had just had all of his shots in May (Praise God).

Everyone agreed that I needed to go to the doctor because puncture wounds was not something you wanted to mess with and I needed to get a tet shot. Stacy asks me if I have insurance and I tell her no. Well, Stacy just so happens to be a medical assistant in a doctors office. So she calls someone and here's what happened in the end.
The doctors office saw me the next morning and charged me ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to see me! Then they only charged me THEIR cost for the tet shot. And then it turned out that the antibiotic that I was going to need was very expensive so Stacy called a pharmacist friend of hers who gave me the antibiotic for $26.00 which she said was a steal!!! In the end it cost me about $60.00 but I am so amazed at how God took care of everything. Now I am much better. Its still completely tender to the touch and a huge bruise around the bite but it doesn't hurt anything like it did in the beginning.

Like I said Im not good at telling stories and Im not going to go back and read this so hopefully I didn't leave anything out or say stuff that doesn't make sense.

Changes

We have so many things going on at the moment. Last fall we bought some land about 20 minutes from here. My husband has been wanting some land for so long and everything just worked out at the time. Our original plan was to move a trailor out there and maybe one day we could build a house. Ideally, we would like more land before we chose to build a house so that might still change. Well, we recently had a tough decision to make. First we found a trailor at such an unbelievable price. A double wide that needs some work but even after we paid for everything we would never even be able to get a single wide for this price. But the only way we will be able to get it is by paying cash. We do not want to go into any more debt. Well, just a few weeks after discovering this trailor someone approached us about renting some of our land to move their trailor on. We knew that we would never want to rent it to someone because we would always have someone on our land. But then she even offered to buy it. And when Brad told her a price she acted like that was no problem. So thats where we were faced with a huge decision. Do we sell our land and get out of debt? Do we sell our house and move?

Well, we have finally decided we want to sell our house. But we do have to act quickly to insure that we can get this trailor before someone else does. I would absolutely love to have more room. But at the same time I am so terrified of being home alone and I just started staying by myself in this house a few months ago. Well part of what makes me feel safer is having neighbors. Where we will be moving there aren't that many neighbors close by. Nowhere near enough to make me feel safe. And then we live right off of the highway. I really enjoy our location for the fact that we are kind of in the middle of the two cities we go to on a regular basis. And there's more of what I will miss. What I wont miss? A train coming by my front yard every 2 hours if not more. A train blaring its horn and waking my babies up or even wake us up in the middle of the night. A kitchen so tiny I dont even have a place to put everything. Literally, I would enjoy a small apartment kitchen much more. At least then I would have cabinets!! I could go on and on with my list of pros and cons for moving or staying. And then to top it off I found out last night that my grandparents are moving right up the road from me! They will still be closer but it was so exciting to hear that news. Now we just continue to pray for God's guidance and direction. And of course the energy and resources to fix our house so we can sell it. My husband already works so hard and he is really going to have to put in a lot of hours for what needs to be done around here.

FINALLY!

I have finally (for the most part) achieved the first thing I was really after by losing weight. Besides such obvious reasons one of the biggest reasons I wanted to lose weight was so I could wear my wedding bands again. It has been about 2 years since I have been able to wear them. Over 2 years actually and we've only been married for over 3 years. That means I got to wear my rings for a little over a year! It was just shortly into my pregnancy with Talan that I was no longer able to wear them. And the one time I got them on after I had Talan my fingers started hurting so bad after just a couple of hours that I had to take them off. Well, I have now had them on all day and I also wore them Tuesday night. The reason I say (for the most part) is because I haven't slept in them yet. I dont know if I feel like thats something I will be able to do yet but we will see soon I hope. So for now I am one happily married woman! At least I feel more like a married woman when I have my rings on....Silly probably but I dont care.

Chicken Fettucini

So last night I ventured out to try a new recipe. And the end result.... It was really just ok. It was kind of bland with not much taste. It was chicken cooked in a creamy sauce with seasoning, garlic, tomatoes and onion. And honestly, Im surprised with all the stuff it had in it that it was so bland. But I drowned mine in parmesan (which is how I eat my spaghetti) and I enjoyed it that way. I really love cooking and haven't had that much experience. So its getting to be kind of a downer that the last several recipes I have tried have not turned out that good. I know thats all part of it but I wish I could look at a recipe and know if its something I think will taste really good. I do think once I have been cooking regularly and trying new stuff that I will eventually be able to do that. So the end verdict is my husband agreed it tasted like it didn't have any sauce so it is not something we will be eating again.